Maybe I am treating Parker more lilke a child than a dog. When we watch 24 together, I mute the tv when disturbing scenes come on the screen because I don't want him influenced by the graphic and audio violence.

I've been spending my evenings watching dvds of 24. After 42 hours of straight violence, I have noticed a striking pattern.

Amidst the chaos and calamity, female hostages find the time to apply lipgloss.

Have you ever left a pill in your mouth for too long and it began to dissolve before you could sallow? Medicine tastes like chalky Ipecac and eventually numbs the entire surface area of the oral cavity.

The moral of the blog is, do not put both a mint and a prescribed anti-depressant in your mouth and sallow the breathmint while leaving the Zoloft to melt on your tongue.

It is true. Absolut Insanity is officially on hiatus. Will be back next month when all life changing events are coalesced into a single worthy-of-reading blog entry.

If I had a litter of puppies and gave them away, I wouldn't want an adopting parent to send an email as I did with the following:

"Parker and I went to puppy training class this Saturday. He had a wild time playing with puppies his size. Usually, he romps around with big big dogs. We’re bonding quite nicely. He still makes me want to go on murderous rages when he spazzes and runs around the apartment like a puppy on crack."