i will admit that i'm sad about j. i thought that we would have hung out since the last time and that i wouldnt be this upset. the last time we saw each other, i felt like myself. i didn't pretend to be all girly and cute and i wasn't nervous. i was being me. i think i even snorted while watching the movies and i actually paid attention to them, meaning my mind wasn't racing with thoughts of marriage or whatnot.
well, now i feel sort of blue and deflated because i haven't seen him in two weeks. he texts me all the time, but again, that isn't enough for me. when will i learn and when will he learn that what''s going on is sort of retarded.
i will give myself another chance to rectify the situation and by rectify i mean hanging out as just friends. like really like friends. hahahhah i promise. i think i can do it. who wants to place a bet?!
Saturday, January 26
so i'm a little peeved. i left a note for my roommates to help out by buying garbage bags and to take out the garbage and recycling. i lived here for over three months and i can count how many times it was taken out by either of them. two.
i admit that i make the most trash and use the kitchen most, hence me always taking it out, but that does not excuse them for never taking it out ever. i know my standards of cleanliness surpasses most individuals so i don't complain or ask for their help. i mop, because the floor grosses me out if it's not cleaned each week. i clean the toilets when i see fit, and i usually spray down the shower.
so when i asked who erased the message off the fridge about helping out with the trash, my roommate said, " i bought trashbags, but i feel whoever uses the kitchen the most should take out the trash. i'll take out the recycling because i use that' and i said, ' I ALWAYYYSS take it out" and walked away.
if you use the trash ONE time a day, i think someone with some sense of kindness and responsibility would be like, "oh, let me be a good roommate and take this shit out." apparently the ratio of usage to responsibility is quite high. each one has taken it out once since i lived here. cleaned zero.
i think this anger started to build as i stopped hearing from j and when i had to talk to one roommate about flushing the toilet and his response to my request was of shock that i cared that i had to flush his pee.
i have to communicate my feelings of contempt because i know i will run into this problem unless i start rooming with someone with ocd cleanliness. i know once i start living with a boyfriend i will kill him for every annoying cleaning faux pas.
i will give the roommate some credit though. i know he knows he should pick up some slack because he did buy some garbage bags and he admitted that i threw out the trash all the time and he's been better about cleaning his dishes within the day.
now if i can get them to wipe down the tables after use and fix the shower curtain after showering i will be happier.
there are several options i have to solve this challenge. one, stop caring about the trash and let it overflow. two, stop cleaning the toilets until something starts growing and comes alive. three. stop fixing the shower curtain and let mold form on the sides. four, stop mopping so the grime can build up and become as dirty as it was before a professional floor cleaner came to scrape off three layers of accumulated dirt. five, tell them that they're dirty bastards and they should help out. six, meet someone else and start getting continual ass so i stop focusing on cleaning and yelling at my roommates.
i admit that i make the most trash and use the kitchen most, hence me always taking it out, but that does not excuse them for never taking it out ever. i know my standards of cleanliness surpasses most individuals so i don't complain or ask for their help. i mop, because the floor grosses me out if it's not cleaned each week. i clean the toilets when i see fit, and i usually spray down the shower.
so when i asked who erased the message off the fridge about helping out with the trash, my roommate said, " i bought trashbags, but i feel whoever uses the kitchen the most should take out the trash. i'll take out the recycling because i use that' and i said, ' I ALWAYYYSS take it out" and walked away.
if you use the trash ONE time a day, i think someone with some sense of kindness and responsibility would be like, "oh, let me be a good roommate and take this shit out." apparently the ratio of usage to responsibility is quite high. each one has taken it out once since i lived here. cleaned zero.
i think this anger started to build as i stopped hearing from j and when i had to talk to one roommate about flushing the toilet and his response to my request was of shock that i cared that i had to flush his pee.
i have to communicate my feelings of contempt because i know i will run into this problem unless i start rooming with someone with ocd cleanliness. i know once i start living with a boyfriend i will kill him for every annoying cleaning faux pas.
i will give the roommate some credit though. i know he knows he should pick up some slack because he did buy some garbage bags and he admitted that i threw out the trash all the time and he's been better about cleaning his dishes within the day.
now if i can get them to wipe down the tables after use and fix the shower curtain after showering i will be happier.
there are several options i have to solve this challenge. one, stop caring about the trash and let it overflow. two, stop cleaning the toilets until something starts growing and comes alive. three. stop fixing the shower curtain and let mold form on the sides. four, stop mopping so the grime can build up and become as dirty as it was before a professional floor cleaner came to scrape off three layers of accumulated dirt. five, tell them that they're dirty bastards and they should help out. six, meet someone else and start getting continual ass so i stop focusing on cleaning and yelling at my roommates.
oh i have more...... just add these onto the previous ten..so i dont know how many that is....
1. i wear the same pjs everyday until the next laundry day. i already wear two outfits a day, not to mention workout clothes. i would spend way too much time and money at the laundry mat. it's just too overwhelming with the amount of dirty clothes i accumulate each week so adding pjs to the mix would send me over the edge.
2. i fabreeze everything. just like the guy with the windex from the greek wedding movie, i am the asian girl with the fabreeze. sheets, shoes, workout clothes, jackets, backpacks, the stairs...you get the idea. i will also make the bed and fabreeze it while you're in it. sorry dude. i like things smelling nice.
3. i take up to three showers a day. i used to take four then it went down to three. now it's down to two. two is manageable and i like it. there will also be no room for your shampoo or soap. i ban bar soap. that stuff is gross. every shelf, nook and cranny will be used by my toiletrees. i must have every kind of facewash, body scrub, and shaver known to woman. on the plus side, i am clean and i smell good. i don't ever really smell even after a good spin class.
4. i am near deaf. televisions and radios are turned to its highest level because i am hard of hearing, but put me in a coffee shop and i can hear what a couple on the other side of the room is saying. it's called selective hearing.
5. i remember EVERYTHING. remember that story you told me the second night i met you about this drunken night with your old roommate and you guys had that random job and met that random girl with that thing? well i will remember all those details and then bring it up when you want to tell that story again. yes, you told me this story before and most likely i will endure hearing it again, because i don't want to hurt your feelings. i will remember your parent's birthdays, your neices and nephew's names and who you took as your prom date in 1983. i won't feel bad if you forget the details of my life, but if you forget my birthday i will kill you.
6. i pee a lot and drink lots of water. get used to pausing the dvd or letting me sit at end seats at the theater. my bladder is either the size of a peanut or my liver is insanely efficient. stock up on toilet paper because i don't know how to use the appropriate amount. i will ruin the moment by saying, "excuse me, i will be right back" in the beginning of the relatinship to "i gotta piss" once we get comfortable. oh and always offer to refill my glass of water.
7. road rage. i'm from newyork and jersey. i curse and i have to use breathing techniques to drive. i change lanes every thiry-five seconds. i must go faster than the next guy. after the last couple of speeding tickets, i've learned to only go seven miles over the speed limit and to stop at stop signs. i also talk on the phone, drink coffee, and put on lipgloss while driving. seat belts and airbags, i have.
8. i care how i look and how you look, in public and in private. i like aesthetically pleasing things. sometimes i'm harsh on myself, sometimes i'm harsh on others but generally, i like clean and nice looking. that means i'm usually in makeup when i wake up until right after dinner. during my non-makeup hours, all hells break loose. old clothes, glasses, and wild hair is the name of the game. i like a man who shaves, takes care of the unibrow, and knows what a hair-style is. name-brand clothing is a plus. i'm not talking DnG, but something respectable. i had my target days, but i'm a woman now. i like quality over quantity. oh and i like new and pretty things. i value the vintage coat, the old frat T-shirts, and the lucky boxers so those you can keep. holes in socks, NO. holes in underwear, No. and i cannot stress the importance of an exfoliated face. don't worry, i'll do it for you when we take showers together. you can blame it on your girlfriend.
9. i'm pretty much blind. until i get good health insurance and have the opportunity for lasik, i will be blind when i wake up. you will have to tell me the time bc everything is fuzzy unless it's three inches from my pupils. i will immediately stick in the contacts. i wear glasses before bed. bottlecaps are in fashion, if you didn't know. and if we ever get stranded on an island, we can start a fire with them. i could say my vision is poor because i read a lot as a kid or im an asian and our visual chromosomes are shit, but really i think it's from all that super mario on the gameboy. oh and one reason why i dont smoke marijuana. my eyes get wayyyy too small...
10. i only watch school boy/screw ball comedy movies (Old School), funny TV shows (Fam Guy), and really bad action movies (i.e. Fast n Furious). and i laugh really really loud..sometimes i will snort. people have compared my laugh to Peter Griffin. dont know who that is? we shouldn't be friends. hotel rwanda, eh. ray, bah. schindler's list, depressing. good shephard, could have saved two hours of my life. that drama, think about life stuff really bores the living shit out of me. I refuse to watch horror movies. I will hide under the covers and scream before the scary part comes. as part of my career, i listen to real drama and real life-changing stories. when i chill out, i want to laugh and i laugh a lot. real loud. to an embarressing degree. friends have moved seats at the theater. if you're a funny guy, you will have to adjust to the decible of my constant laughing. i'm sure it will be an ego boost to hang out with me.
11. queen of typos. i type fast like a tweeky club slash computer geek and if i ever chat on IM or write emails, i will type as fast as i talk. and i dont fix typos either. i find it part of my charm to send 5 lines of text within ten second, mostly consisting of "HAHAHAHA."
12. addicted to craigislist. it's not fun to admitthat i spend an abnormal armount of time on 'best of' and missed connections. i like to think that others are looking at me when im' in public. i do searches for 'asian' m4w just to see if they posted something i wore that day at whatever place i went. zero thus far.
13. i will shove a mint or piece of gum your way. you will become obsessed with your breath and your body odor because i have x-men ability to smell. you will learn to floss and brush and be afraid that i wont kiss you because of the pizza you had for lunch. yea i can smell that pepperoni.
14. i worry what your family and friends think about me. i know others' opnions of me shouldn't matter but it does. i care what my friends think about you. you have to be nice to my friends and family even if they are mean and catty. you have to say only nice things about them and never complain if i make you come to family gatherings. you have to compliment my girlfriends. you have to enjoy sports and drink whiskey and beer with my guyfriends. you also have to hate the pats or just tom brady. even if i bitch about my family, you are not to say mean things. they are my my life and i love them. i will do the same for you. i will see the best of your friends and family even if they bug the shit out of you. if i really do like you and already deemed you boyfriend-worthy, i will be proud to go to family functions and friend gatherings. i will look cute and say genuinely nice things because that's who i am. i will also worry if they like me and think we are a good match. it is your job to insist that i am great and that i make you happy so it makes them happy.
1. i wear the same pjs everyday until the next laundry day. i already wear two outfits a day, not to mention workout clothes. i would spend way too much time and money at the laundry mat. it's just too overwhelming with the amount of dirty clothes i accumulate each week so adding pjs to the mix would send me over the edge.
2. i fabreeze everything. just like the guy with the windex from the greek wedding movie, i am the asian girl with the fabreeze. sheets, shoes, workout clothes, jackets, backpacks, the stairs...you get the idea. i will also make the bed and fabreeze it while you're in it. sorry dude. i like things smelling nice.
3. i take up to three showers a day. i used to take four then it went down to three. now it's down to two. two is manageable and i like it. there will also be no room for your shampoo or soap. i ban bar soap. that stuff is gross. every shelf, nook and cranny will be used by my toiletrees. i must have every kind of facewash, body scrub, and shaver known to woman. on the plus side, i am clean and i smell good. i don't ever really smell even after a good spin class.
4. i am near deaf. televisions and radios are turned to its highest level because i am hard of hearing, but put me in a coffee shop and i can hear what a couple on the other side of the room is saying. it's called selective hearing.
5. i remember EVERYTHING. remember that story you told me the second night i met you about this drunken night with your old roommate and you guys had that random job and met that random girl with that thing? well i will remember all those details and then bring it up when you want to tell that story again. yes, you told me this story before and most likely i will endure hearing it again, because i don't want to hurt your feelings. i will remember your parent's birthdays, your neices and nephew's names and who you took as your prom date in 1983. i won't feel bad if you forget the details of my life, but if you forget my birthday i will kill you.
6. i pee a lot and drink lots of water. get used to pausing the dvd or letting me sit at end seats at the theater. my bladder is either the size of a peanut or my liver is insanely efficient. stock up on toilet paper because i don't know how to use the appropriate amount. i will ruin the moment by saying, "excuse me, i will be right back" in the beginning of the relatinship to "i gotta piss" once we get comfortable. oh and always offer to refill my glass of water.
7. road rage. i'm from newyork and jersey. i curse and i have to use breathing techniques to drive. i change lanes every thiry-five seconds. i must go faster than the next guy. after the last couple of speeding tickets, i've learned to only go seven miles over the speed limit and to stop at stop signs. i also talk on the phone, drink coffee, and put on lipgloss while driving. seat belts and airbags, i have.
8. i care how i look and how you look, in public and in private. i like aesthetically pleasing things. sometimes i'm harsh on myself, sometimes i'm harsh on others but generally, i like clean and nice looking. that means i'm usually in makeup when i wake up until right after dinner. during my non-makeup hours, all hells break loose. old clothes, glasses, and wild hair is the name of the game. i like a man who shaves, takes care of the unibrow, and knows what a hair-style is. name-brand clothing is a plus. i'm not talking DnG, but something respectable. i had my target days, but i'm a woman now. i like quality over quantity. oh and i like new and pretty things. i value the vintage coat, the old frat T-shirts, and the lucky boxers so those you can keep. holes in socks, NO. holes in underwear, No. and i cannot stress the importance of an exfoliated face. don't worry, i'll do it for you when we take showers together. you can blame it on your girlfriend.
9. i'm pretty much blind. until i get good health insurance and have the opportunity for lasik, i will be blind when i wake up. you will have to tell me the time bc everything is fuzzy unless it's three inches from my pupils. i will immediately stick in the contacts. i wear glasses before bed. bottlecaps are in fashion, if you didn't know. and if we ever get stranded on an island, we can start a fire with them. i could say my vision is poor because i read a lot as a kid or im an asian and our visual chromosomes are shit, but really i think it's from all that super mario on the gameboy. oh and one reason why i dont smoke marijuana. my eyes get wayyyy too small...
10. i only watch school boy/screw ball comedy movies (Old School), funny TV shows (Fam Guy), and really bad action movies (i.e. Fast n Furious). and i laugh really really loud..sometimes i will snort. people have compared my laugh to Peter Griffin. dont know who that is? we shouldn't be friends. hotel rwanda, eh. ray, bah. schindler's list, depressing. good shephard, could have saved two hours of my life. that drama, think about life stuff really bores the living shit out of me. I refuse to watch horror movies. I will hide under the covers and scream before the scary part comes. as part of my career, i listen to real drama and real life-changing stories. when i chill out, i want to laugh and i laugh a lot. real loud. to an embarressing degree. friends have moved seats at the theater. if you're a funny guy, you will have to adjust to the decible of my constant laughing. i'm sure it will be an ego boost to hang out with me.
11. queen of typos. i type fast like a tweeky club slash computer geek and if i ever chat on IM or write emails, i will type as fast as i talk. and i dont fix typos either. i find it part of my charm to send 5 lines of text within ten second, mostly consisting of "HAHAHAHA."
12. addicted to craigislist. it's not fun to admitthat i spend an abnormal armount of time on 'best of' and missed connections. i like to think that others are looking at me when im' in public. i do searches for 'asian' m4w just to see if they posted something i wore that day at whatever place i went. zero thus far.
13. i will shove a mint or piece of gum your way. you will become obsessed with your breath and your body odor because i have x-men ability to smell. you will learn to floss and brush and be afraid that i wont kiss you because of the pizza you had for lunch. yea i can smell that pepperoni.
14. i worry what your family and friends think about me. i know others' opnions of me shouldn't matter but it does. i care what my friends think about you. you have to be nice to my friends and family even if they are mean and catty. you have to say only nice things about them and never complain if i make you come to family gatherings. you have to compliment my girlfriends. you have to enjoy sports and drink whiskey and beer with my guyfriends. you also have to hate the pats or just tom brady. even if i bitch about my family, you are not to say mean things. they are my my life and i love them. i will do the same for you. i will see the best of your friends and family even if they bug the shit out of you. if i really do like you and already deemed you boyfriend-worthy, i will be proud to go to family functions and friend gatherings. i will look cute and say genuinely nice things because that's who i am. i will also worry if they like me and think we are a good match. it is your job to insist that i am great and that i make you happy so it makes them happy.
Thursday, January 24
I saw this on craigslist. my ten worst qualities. hahhaha and if you like them, then i will consider you boyfriend-possible.
1. I like things clean. super clean, but if not super clean at least organized, there's a space for everything and every drawer has a purpose and a category. mind you, since having roommates, my need for constant organization and cleaning has gone from twice a day to once a week. that is super progress. i think once a week is respectable and necessary. the guy i date, needs to be clean and organized, but in a cute guy sort of way. anything at my ocd level is unattractive and weird. only i get to be the martha stewart in this relationship.
2. i like to try new recipes and cook things according to whatever diet i am on. you will have plenty of food to eat and it's usually tasty. something different for every meal of the day, except breakfast. i like things pretty so you know the food will look good and taste good. plus the dishes and glasses are going to be clean too. oh and it's tasty and healthy so you won't be gettin fat anytime soon.
3. i like to have different types of beverages at all times. tea, coffee, water, wine...whatever suits my mood. that means, alcohol is always in the house or something that will quench your thirst at an given moment.
4. i like to work out. no fatties here. yes i put on some poundages while i tried to get out of my starvation period and I bypassed normal sized me a couple of months back. don't worry, i will be back to normal soon since me and food are friends again. yes, going to the gym is fun. running outside is fun. playing tennis is great. you gotta like the outdoors or at least sweating just a tad. all tans should be procured through outdoor activities, not the tanning bed.
5. i love dogs. cats are weird. i love dogs so much that i stop owners in stores and pet their dogs. i shout with glee with every dog i see. the looks i give to puppies are looks people usually reserve for human babies. i currently think babies are ....not as cool.
6. I'm pretty independent. Babies scare me. I am cool with dating and commitment. Babies are not in my near future. You want a family? Well, you will have to wait a long time to know if I want one. You should have friends to hang out with and watch sports. i love sports. I love my girlfriends. Your friends must be cool and be able to hang out with my friends. Two separate pools of friends who sometimes mingle. Separate, yet combined...but remember, you gotta have your own posse.
7. I like loud techno music and top 40. when i get ready to go out for work, to workout, meeting friends, I need loud music, and preferably the loud club type stuff. and I dance to it like a punk kid on crack. and sometimes naked. deal.
8. My phone and I are pretty inseparable. Yes I will put it on silent if im hanging out with you or on a dinner date. I will even turn it to vibrate at the coffee shop or when im eating dinner. but lord i check it every two minutes for a text message or a missed call. i got friends across the country who need me sometimes. and family members who forget about the whole pacific coast time thing.
9. I have ADHD when it comes to watching tv, movies, listening to music. People sometimes get vertigo or seizures with the amount of channel changing I do and the amount I pause on dvds. I always think something is better on.
10. I like to cuddle. Yes it used to gross me out, but now I appreciate it. i like human pillows. Guys are so comfy and squishy. You must have enough muscle to make yourself into a piilow. no boney or skinny men. that is gross. and no fatties either. we established that in one of the earlier numbers.
send me a line :)
(ps i may post this on craigs) hahahha
1. I like things clean. super clean, but if not super clean at least organized, there's a space for everything and every drawer has a purpose and a category. mind you, since having roommates, my need for constant organization and cleaning has gone from twice a day to once a week. that is super progress. i think once a week is respectable and necessary. the guy i date, needs to be clean and organized, but in a cute guy sort of way. anything at my ocd level is unattractive and weird. only i get to be the martha stewart in this relationship.
2. i like to try new recipes and cook things according to whatever diet i am on. you will have plenty of food to eat and it's usually tasty. something different for every meal of the day, except breakfast. i like things pretty so you know the food will look good and taste good. plus the dishes and glasses are going to be clean too. oh and it's tasty and healthy so you won't be gettin fat anytime soon.
3. i like to have different types of beverages at all times. tea, coffee, water, wine...whatever suits my mood. that means, alcohol is always in the house or something that will quench your thirst at an given moment.
4. i like to work out. no fatties here. yes i put on some poundages while i tried to get out of my starvation period and I bypassed normal sized me a couple of months back. don't worry, i will be back to normal soon since me and food are friends again. yes, going to the gym is fun. running outside is fun. playing tennis is great. you gotta like the outdoors or at least sweating just a tad. all tans should be procured through outdoor activities, not the tanning bed.
5. i love dogs. cats are weird. i love dogs so much that i stop owners in stores and pet their dogs. i shout with glee with every dog i see. the looks i give to puppies are looks people usually reserve for human babies. i currently think babies are ....not as cool.
6. I'm pretty independent. Babies scare me. I am cool with dating and commitment. Babies are not in my near future. You want a family? Well, you will have to wait a long time to know if I want one. You should have friends to hang out with and watch sports. i love sports. I love my girlfriends. Your friends must be cool and be able to hang out with my friends. Two separate pools of friends who sometimes mingle. Separate, yet combined...but remember, you gotta have your own posse.
7. I like loud techno music and top 40. when i get ready to go out for work, to workout, meeting friends, I need loud music, and preferably the loud club type stuff. and I dance to it like a punk kid on crack. and sometimes naked. deal.
8. My phone and I are pretty inseparable. Yes I will put it on silent if im hanging out with you or on a dinner date. I will even turn it to vibrate at the coffee shop or when im eating dinner. but lord i check it every two minutes for a text message or a missed call. i got friends across the country who need me sometimes. and family members who forget about the whole pacific coast time thing.
9. I have ADHD when it comes to watching tv, movies, listening to music. People sometimes get vertigo or seizures with the amount of channel changing I do and the amount I pause on dvds. I always think something is better on.
10. I like to cuddle. Yes it used to gross me out, but now I appreciate it. i like human pillows. Guys are so comfy and squishy. You must have enough muscle to make yourself into a piilow. no boney or skinny men. that is gross. and no fatties either. we established that in one of the earlier numbers.
send me a line :)
(ps i may post this on craigs) hahahha
Wednesday, January 23
this is funny http://www.craigslist.org/about/best/lou/106752674.html
i'm bored. really bored and lonely for the next 30 minutes while i wait to leave for a store meeting, where it will be more of a gathering of friends than actual work meeting-ness.
who wants to have breakfast with me in the morning? i have lonely breakfasts. someone join me please! i am making waffles and perhaps some canadian bacon.
i decided to eat what i feel like eating and stopping with rules. whatever. hahaha ugh. the bacon may make me want to puke. who knows! anyway, writing this blog only took two minutes. i got a plate of nachos here. you want to finish?
today i had sushi at this small hole in the wall place. um, enough about food. let's see. i got a bottle of reisling. want to share? hmm..
someone from college just moved to sf so i will be showing her around, meaning she will be befriending my friends. she is crazy! hahaha um, and did you know someone else from college/soror lives pretty close by? didnt know! we california girls :)
ummm okay three minutes has passed. i guess i should work on my school work. oh my. yes.
i'm bored. really bored and lonely for the next 30 minutes while i wait to leave for a store meeting, where it will be more of a gathering of friends than actual work meeting-ness.
who wants to have breakfast with me in the morning? i have lonely breakfasts. someone join me please! i am making waffles and perhaps some canadian bacon.
i decided to eat what i feel like eating and stopping with rules. whatever. hahaha ugh. the bacon may make me want to puke. who knows! anyway, writing this blog only took two minutes. i got a plate of nachos here. you want to finish?
today i had sushi at this small hole in the wall place. um, enough about food. let's see. i got a bottle of reisling. want to share? hmm..
someone from college just moved to sf so i will be showing her around, meaning she will be befriending my friends. she is crazy! hahaha um, and did you know someone else from college/soror lives pretty close by? didnt know! we california girls :)
ummm okay three minutes has passed. i guess i should work on my school work. oh my. yes.
Tuesday, January 22
Monday, January 21
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