medium-toned black man

Cameron thinks I'm racist for wanting a medium-toned black man. When did it become a crime to state the color of skin we would like to date? People specify height, race, body built, hair color, eye color, job, housing, education, etc. So what if I want a certain tanned skinned individual? Until guys stop wanting a hot bodied girl, which implies they don't want fatties, then I can say I want a black man with a particular flava.

Poo

I should market my poo

just dance

remember the days when you wanted to go out and dance so bad? you want to dance and you actually dance. you plan the night at 3pm, you attend class, eat dinner, take a nap, and shower. you put on make-up playing dance music. you pre-game with your roommates and talk about seeing Big Man on Campus at Bar. then, you and the gang hop in the car driven by the DD for the night. you pay a tiny cover charge and dance the night away. it's 2:30am, everyone talks about where to go for late-night at the local pizza place. drunkenly eating pizza, you hop back in the car and head to late-night. you arrive home at 4am. all-in-all a fun ass night.

now it's more like, you think to yourself how it may be nice to go out for a drink and shake your booty. it's 4pm and you're tired as shit. after a colorful ride home on the Bart, you shower, eat dinner, flip on tv, and check the episodes on dvr. 9pm rolls around and no one has texted you about going out. you look out the window and the sun has gone down. OO! a new episode of Girls Next Door is on. yea. you sit on your ass for another hour and a half before rolling into bed. maybe next week you will make it to the bars. promise.

sore neck

I find it hard to write with the new layout. it looks too pretty and i am compelled to entertain the masses (five people) with coherent passages.

at club monaco, i learned to attack strangers with impromptu factoids to keep them engaged in conversation. i pull shit out of my ass to facilitate communication and dig deep inside to remain truthful and happy. it is hard work.

i plan to go up to a strange hot man and compliment his shoes and then ask him about his drink. i will talk incessantly about the local sports team and my affinity for brett favre and vodka. he will find me fascinating and friendly and buy me and himself drinks.

titles suck

i can't believe i have to put a title in front of each post. this is going to take inventive brain power. why do asians come to sf and shop at club monaco? all the girls look a like. i swear the same 45 year-old asian lady of japanese descent comes to the store every hour. either that or they go to the same colorist, make-up artist, and eat the same 1,000 calorie diet. god.

here is a song i want to sing (not sing) to he-who-shall-not-be-named: Get Back

chinese remedy

if you have an acute weak cold, do the following. keep your neck and forehead covered. gurgle with salt water. do not eat cheese, nuts, or sweet things. drink salty soup. drink tomato juice. eat onion, spinach, and garlic. drink everything warm or room temperature. listen to lady ga-ga and rihanna.

crack

why do i crack myself up?

wow. working is a lot of work. four days in a row doing like 9 hour days. i dont know how you kids do it!!!

so i went on the lemonade diet for 6.8 days. it was interesting. the jon detox is not going as well as i thought, but i think brighter skies are ahead. club monaco is fun. i'm basically shopping vicariously through people and i got a free outfit from the store...and they know about it. hahahah

today i went to the chinese store and bought me a bunch of weird chinese food like fermented tofu and radish, chili eel and squid, seaweed tied in bows, and 2lbs of ginger. going back to my roots!