Damn. When I don't eat and try to study, I fall asleep. Damn the body's need for glucose to keep the brain working and absorbing information and damn society's pressues for females to be thin! I can't be smart AND skinny. Fuckers!

uh oh. a cute boy from class emailed me.. he's so very cute.

wow. here's a hint. if you want to spend more time with your dog even if he annoys you sometimes, wash him with male body wash. making him smell like a hot boy will make the dog more appealing.

when parker farts, his ears perk up and he looks in the direction of his butt. then, he leans forward and takes a slight smell. do dogs not know when they fart?

I like how last nite on the phone with boy i blurted out, "I MADE OUT WITH JOHN!...like two years ago" I had to get it out. He thought it was interesting that I made out with his frat brother and he also thought I was crazy for admitting to it like I had killed a baby.

i can't handle this. i totally forgot my sexual past during my college years. it seriously escaped my mind, "the list." the list is very long and shameful. i dont know what to do. who would want to be with me if they knew about the list?!

i am so glad i'm in california and not nc because i just remembered how sordid my past is. the boy in nc with whom i'm having relations is about to procure a roommate...someone who i used to drunk dial and try to make out with. in addition, i have made out with another one of his frat brothers, told another frat brother i would hookup with him if he didn't have a girlfriend, tried to make out with another one at a bar one night, annndd hooked up with several members from neighboring fraterniities. how time makes one forget about such trespasses.

who the hell am i kidding? i can't raise a family in nc. i would walk down the street with natalie jr. and run into four bartenders, seven baseball players, thirty fraternity alumnis who ive hooked up with. natalie jr. would grow up to be a floosy!

You know what's sad? I can't pronounce my own name. Natalie is the strangest name ever and it was horrible for my parents to name me something that rhymes with fat.

I went to mass today for school reasons. Why is it that whenever I'm in the house of God, I spend the entire time thinking about sex? There's something about the abomination of premarital sex that gets me riled up.