reason #4342 why i dont want to be in a wedding. i dont want my fatness memorialized. thank you.

i believe my upper respiratory infection is coming to a close. i feel sort of unfit from the lack of exercise and general movements in the past two days. um. i think i will survive.

i never emailed back the online guy who emailed on wednesday asking me to meet him this weekend. i didnt have the physical strength or the mental capacity to deal with that one. i was busy getting over my manager. i can't believe almost a year ago i was complaining about how much of douchebag i thought he was. i mean, i still think he's a total craphead, but an adorable craphead who i have learned to appreciate. he has flaws, for sure, a lot of flaws. many flaws, but he has some good qualities. yes scant, but enough to get by in my book.

i think i really still liked him because no matter how skinny or big i get/got, he still liked me and never commented on my largeness. he did the other day, pat my stomach and said, "PREGNANT?" to make me mad because i was ignoring him. funny how that works. and right beforehand he made me get on his shoulders to hang up this gym bag on the wall so i dont think he really thinks i'm fat. he just knows how to push my buttons. that little shit. he and his brother are little shits. i swear. i should have a talk with their mother and father. they did a GREAT job on them. bah!

anywho, i dont have much to say. my eyes are tired and i can't swallow or breathe....... woo hoo!

throat hurts. sick. ear infection...i think i have strep. can't talk. chest hurts. can't breathe. broken heart as well.